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Sunday 29 June 2014

The first 6 episodes of Game of Thrones: Blood, Gore, Tits and Dragons

Game of Thrones, a show for people who love sitting down.

Game of Bones, a show for archaeologists.

Game of Stones, a show for geologists.

Game of Homes, a show for real estate agents.

Game of Holmes, a show for people who like Sherlock Holmes.

Game of Ones, a show for chartered accountants.

Game of Jones, a show for people with a last name called Jones.

Game of Tomes, a show for old people with beards.

Game of Combs, a show for hairdressers.

Game of Clones, a show for twins.

Game of Drones, a show for techy, military nuts.

Game of Gnomes, a show for gardeners.

Game of this is getting silly, a show for silly people.

Game of Zones, a show for things getting waaaay out of hand.

Game of Woes, a show for people who really need to stop.

Game of Stop. A show for nothing.

Spoilerphobes, beware! Spoilers ahead.

So, I just started watching Game of Thrones. It's really good! I'm only 6 episodes in, but I'm already completely hooked.

I'm watching with my family: my younger sister and older father. My mum was also watching but she stopped after the scene where Daenerys has sex in a tent while staring longingly at some dragon eggs (subtle!). It's a very nice show. Really family friendly.

Me and my Dad are an episode ahead of my sister so that we can suss out the gore and sex, a strategy which has been working so far. There was a scene where a horse got brutally beheaded, and it was a shame to ruin the surprise for my sister, but she had to know it was coming. Other scenes, like a man having molten gold poured all over his head, were less necessary to explain, especially since with that one you actually got to see them actually melting the gold.

So, my first impressions are generally good. The episodes are slowly becoming better and better as the stakes and incoming disaster slowly increase. The ending of episode 4 was when I really got hooked, and episode 5 was even better, then episode 6 just blew everything completely out of the water (Viserys Targerian was the biggest asshole in the universe).

The show also has a lovely obsession with bastard children. Ned Stark has a bastard child, Robert Baratheon has at least 700, Joffrey is the most obvious incest bastard ever. Actually, on the topic of Joffrey, I saw that twist coming from a mile away. I'm sure everyone saw it coming, they don't exactly try to hide the fact that he's got more in common than his 'uncle' than his 'father'. And incest...well, incest! There's not much to say really, other than that there's incest.

I honestly have relatively little to say about the show so far in terms of critical analysis. Actually, I have almost literally nothing. You have no reason to read this. Why the hell are you here?

Oh yeah, because you deeply care about what I have to say. Sorry, forgot. Let's continue:

So, the battle scenes have really picked up. In the first 3 or 4 episodes there weren't any, but about the time when Ned Stark's leg gets stabbed...or earlier, when multiple people's throats get cut, it really does start to pick up. It's quite funny that the blood looks like Ribena, and not very thick Ribena at that, but it's still good. I'm looking forward to seeing some proper Dothraki warfare of some kind, which I'm sure we'll get at some point. Hopefully.

Of course, if you've seen anything past episode 6 of season 1 of this show this post will be completely redundant, but it's still worth reading, right?

Wait, no it's not.

Sorry for wasting your time.


~Pockydon

Saturday 28 June 2014

An update on the URL situation

So, I bring news. News of great confusion and much despair, yet also of joy and goodwill.

I know who nicked my URL.

What you're about to see is something truly shocking. It took me a few seconds to fully realize exactly what I was seeing. But it's best you see it yourself before I give my opinions of the matter, as it really does need to be seen to be believed (I said 'see' more times in that paragraph than I have in my entire life).

So, here it is. pockyblog@blogspot.com


Oh.

There are a few things I love about this. Firstly, the colours are lovely. Really nice and welcoming, if you catch my drift. Also, the font of the title of the blog is quite good. The title itself is also worth a mention. It's a phrase that I think we all should live by; the world would be a better place if everyone thought like this.

However, this does mean that I'm never going to get pockyblog.blogspot.com as a URL. Ever. How could I pursuade a loyal and loving fan to hand over their URL? It'd just be unnecessarily mean. Also, I think it's worth mentioning that this guy has had this blog since 2004. I couldn't even speak in 2004. Well, I could, but not very well. Point is, I hadn't come up with the name 'Pockydon' until 2006, at the earliest. And since this guy hasn't made any blog posts at all, I doubt he's particularly active.

So I shall suffer in silence at the loss of my username, and endure the pain that comes with being such a massive internet celebrity. It's tough to be this famous, but I shall continue, and I shall not complain. At least I have fans...


~Pockydon, rightful heir to PockyBlog.blogspot.com

Pockyblog.blogspot.com was taken

Hello.

I don't know who it was. I don't know why they did it. I don't even know what their blog is about. But I intend to find out.

This isn't the first time something like this has happened. The username 'Pockydon' was taken on PSN, and Xbox Live, so I had to use the name 'Pockydon Donut' instead (in the case of Playstation, an underscore was also needed). @Pockydon is a cursed name on Twitter. Someone, somewhere, has nicked my username.

If you hear anything, you can contact me at...well, here. I intend to find this man/girl, and I intend to end his/her reign. Pocky is my brand (well, it's not really. The Pocky brand surely belongs to those delicious chocolaty snacks, but hey ho) and I intend to get it back. Pockydon.blogspot.com simply wont do.

I know this sounds really up my own arse but I don't care, this has genuinely ruined my day and whoever did it should be ashamed.

...hang on. I've just realized I can search the URL!

I'll keep you posted


~Pockydon, the rightful Pocky.